I’m ready to confess. Despite all my veiled protests against the last object, I was also instrumental in chumming the water for the circling sharks.

Watson and the Shark John Singleton Copley

The latest ‘regret’ story to appear in the New York Times Style Section that has gathered a minute of attention, is due in part, to my doing.

All that guff about classic Greek mythology in the last blog was just a cover to obtain some moral distance from what I knew was to come. So, I should climb from my ivory tower rather than fall face-first into the mud.

Performance Artist Gustaf Broms in NYC Photo: Jesper Haynes

The story is that I knew of this 1st Generation iPhone an age ago, I waited with the owner till interest was piqued and ready to sell. We chose a design sale, as tech auctions seemed unduly nerdy, and hoped it would reach a wider audience among the ‘aesthetes’.

I coined the phrase “24 karat” Golden Ticket to distinguish it from the others and add to its desirability. The Lucky You sticker upside down was the key. ‘Blinging’ it out as if it were Sadam’s sofa. Gilding the apple. We thought of factionalizing it but the client needed it sold quickly. Thankfully Wright Auctions was able to accommodate. We needed to confirm for ourselves and possible bidders that the contents were what was sold, hence the X-ray (which I think will be a standard requirement from now on). I hope it will set the price and squeeze all the possible life out of these tiresome reports.

Was it a good investment? I think so. I mean you could have had it sitting in a bank collecting dust or worse or you could spend on a car (a BMW see NYT Jacob Bernstein) which might work for you until someone pulls up next to you at the traffic lights in the same car or God forbid a better one. Money does nothing sitting still.

Who was the client? A little old lady from Bayside Queens, New York, who bought it at a charity shop? Or was it a playboy, who is hiding out in a Monaco hotel suite, after racking up gambling debts he can’t cover? That’s what reporters want to know so that you can direct your smoldering envy, somewhere. ‘They’ decided it was a friend who gave it to a finance guy, I’d never say that. I am the beard, the cover, a cloud, the deflector.

You’ll never know, and I’ll never tell.

https://www.wright20.com/auctions/2023/03/design/203

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/03/29/style/iphone-2007-auction.html